My boss said that to me once. And it really stayed with me. We are all raised being told that you have to do your best and excel and be an A student. Nothing I disagree with. But then you get into the real world and realize that just isn't real life. Sometimes, C work is good enough. And sometimes, C work is actually really, really good.
I was invited to participate in a research study on working moms and balance (ha!). I probably can't say too much about it as I have a feeling I signed a confidentiality agreement or some kind (was I supposed to
read that?) But two of the questions the interviewer asked me really stood out.
Interviewer: Thinking about your friends and family, how often do you think they'd say you have it all together? All of the time, almost all of the time, sometimes, infrequently or never.
Me: Almost all of the time.
Interviewer: Now thinking about yourself, how often would you say you have it all together? All of the time, almost all of the time, sometimes, infrequently or never.
Me: Infrequently
This morning was one of those days. A day when C work would have been really, really good.
Noah has a cultural heritage day at school. They are supposed to do a presentation on a cultural tradition that their family has and, if they wanted or were able, bring a food item to the potluck for lunch.
This whole deal stressed me out. First, as we looked at it, we don't really have a lot of cultural heritage that we still celebrate or use or pull out at the holidays. We're pretty gosh darn American. We eat hot dogs. Most of my ancestors have been here hundreds of years (the English ones, the German ones came a bit later) and Brian's family is almost all German and have also been here for several generations. We don't really eat any native dishes, do special celebrations, or anything like that. We're your honest to goodness Americans.
Noah decided he wanted to talk about our tradition of
putting out luminarias at Christmas. All well and good. We do it, my parents do it, Brian's parents did it when he was a kid, and my grandparents did it. Cool. There we go.
Until we started doing the research. Yup, luminarias are from Spain. And have you seen us? Yeah, not so much or a drop of Spanish ancestry in us. Ah well. Brian had the brilliant idea of using this to talk about how America is a melting pot. Bingo. That solves it.
He did his research and we printed up some photos and I was feeling good about it. Until I picked him up last night.
Noah: Mom! Today was the best, my friend ______ had the biggest cultural heritage poster yet! It was amazing.
Me: [picturing our little pile of pictures and notebook paper at home] Really? That's great!
Noah: Yeah, it was awesome.
Me: [knowing it's 4 degrees out and Eli has been screaming "MILK" at the top of his lungs for the past 15 minutes in the car and knowing we have no poster board at home] Super cool! Did all of the kids have posters?
Noah: Yup! And then my friend, ________, she gave us all really cool rocks that say "PEACE" on them. When are we going to do my poster? Am I bringing a present?
We got home, (Eli got his milk), and I dug out some construction paper to at least try to make a book. Nice the construction paper is faded all around the edges. I think it's from when I was in third grade. (Note to self: time to declutter the art supplies.)
Noah then asked what I was bringing to the luncheon tomorrow (today). He asked if it could please be Christmas morning biscuits.
Christmas morning biscuits are just that. The biscuits my Dad traditionally makes on Christmas morning. Several years ago, he hastily typed up a collection of our family recipes and gave us a copy. I say hastily as the thing has several typos.
I assembled the dry ingredients last night and set them aside for this morning. Planning ahead. Staying on top of things. Living that working mom dream.
Got up early to head down to make coffee and, hopefully, some darn good biscuits, posterboard presentation or not.
It seemed to get off to a bad start right away. This just didn't seem to be the right texture. I referenced the recipe again and nope, I was following it exactly. But it was like I had thick flour all over the mat.
Added a bit more milk. Still no great results. Reassured myself that I had never actually made these and it must be right.
Can't find the biscuit cutters. Crap. Oh well, will use a tiger cup instead.
They are falling apart all over the place and I am now thinking. "Okay, even if these are passable I am sending them to school with Noah and not bringing them myself." I can't show my face alongside these biscuits. They're biscuits for goodness sake, and other people are making complicated ethnic dishes. And I am screwing up biscuits.
Oh my God. What is wrong with me?
I have never made something so ugly in my life.
Forget it, I am done. I'm cooking what I have and tossing the rest.
And no, the green olives were from dinner last night. Must. Clean. The. Sink. More. Often.
What did I do wrong??? Aaargh, it's 7:00 and I am still in my robe with wet (drying) hair and no makeup and I have to take all three kids to school today. And get them there by 7:45. And it's 15 minutes away!
They came out of the oven looking like this. They never made it off the tray.
Maybe my problem was cooking with an elephant. Look at him, he won't even look at me. Even he is appalled by this mess.
Or maybe I should have added the glue.
Or it could have been not enough Lego toys, little Army men or Matchbox cars.
Or perhaps it was just that, when I went to consult another family cookbook that one of the typos was that my Dad had doubled the recipe while halving the milk.
Regardless, my kid shed some tears over the failed biscuits and went to school with no food to share and his non-poster boarded presentation. He was, however, wearing a polo shirt (because they also could wear something from their heritage...and hmmm, well, as Brian said, "The English play polo!")
So there you have it. Sometimes C work is good enough. And sometimes it's really the best you can do.
If you're having one of those Mom Guilt days, check out
CopMama for here Mama Guilt Mondays.
And you can also link up with
Silly Little Sparrow, and find out what others have been dealing with this week.